Basement Jacks

…………………………….. Got past security to bring you these exclusive photos.This is the top-secret
site in East Sussex, where deep excavations are taking place for an as yet undisclosed reason.

Local residents,or as they known in this part of the country,
‘curtain-twitchers’,tell me that heavy construction plant has been arriving
at the site for the last ten days.

………… It’s not an easy life being a journalist, up at the crack of Dawn
(she’s very accommodating), evading thugs acting as ‘security guards’
then laying in the mud all day to bring the truth to the nation.
If that’s not bad enough, you have to try to gain info from the locals.

This then is how I found myself in a local hostelry last night plying all and
sundry with drink, in an effort to get my story. ‘Market Marcus’ Gimp, a 36
year old stallholder and car boot specialist, emptied my wallet before I got the scoop.

Apparently a reclusive billionaire owns the property where the excavation work
is happening.

Marcus’ son, a boy scout, managed to gain entry to the site in the early hours of
yesterday morning after feeding the guard dogs steak that he had heavily laced
with sedatives. Marcus proudly told me that Gavin was awarded his Medication and
Poisons Badge only last week.

Just before Gavin passed out (he’d accidentally consumed some of the sedatives), he told Marcus that a huge storage area was being built underneath the cliff-top mansion, the reason still unknown.


6 thoughts on “Basement Jacks

  1. As you know 70s, I am currently in training with the ‘Boring for England’ team for 2012, not sure where you got the ‘Large tools’ bit though, my last girlfriend never mentioned that ?

  2. The shoring equipment used for the pipe work is owned by Mabey Bridge and Shore…who have a history dating back to World War II over on your side of the pond.

    Just sayin.

    …I never forget…sorry, where was I?

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